BORN 14 JULY 2017


Just writing that my beautiful girl died, brings it all back to haunt me...

Hermione. I vowed after my Abyssian passed away at 18 years of age, that my feline days were over.

But then, I met a man and 2 little boys...

And for my eldest step-sons' birthday, and my longing for a Ragdoll, I gave in and bought Hermione....I normally give my pets a middle name or a double-barrelled name, I thought of Hermione Faith, so I guess, silently, this was her middle name, or Hope.....Neither was good enough for her on that fateful night..

Hermione fell into to my arms 3 years ago, I arrived at the breeders' home and saw her little, perfectly-formed face for the first time, I instantly fell in love.

She came home with me in her little carrier, practically wrapped in swaddling clothes and laying in a manger.. Well, that was my version, although she was cosy as...

For the first month, I broke all the rules, she slept with me every night, little wriggler that she was, I did not care in the slightest, she was safe, loved and happy.

She was full of beans, prancing sprightly for her balls and toys hanging from wands, she loved to play, but slept in equal measures.

I knew I had to keep her safe, indoors as much as possible....but she loved her home and her surroundings, she would run through the grass out the back of my home, I always kept a close eye, or at the very least, try to..

I noticed a black and white Tom, lurking for all to see, but Hermione was in awe of this confident puss! They prowled, danced, stalked, for days.....until Mr.Tom became that evermore brave & breezy and decided to invite himself in. This happened a few times, we were all tucked up for the night and then a shriek! He had taken her.... My Hermione, was expecting...

As her belly grew round, she slept and slept, ate, played and snoozed with me mostly, this was the nearest I came, to experiencing what an expectant mother would feel like....I sadly could not have children of my own, so my animals were my wholeness in life.

The night came, I knew this was the night she was to give birth, she was ready. Her breathing became a little more rapid, I instinctly knew the signs and made her nest under my sons bed, where she had gone to hide or sleep on numerous occasions. I placed fluffy towels as her base in a large under bed store that she could come and go as before. But first, Hermione wanted to be close to me, my skin on hers.. she slept at the bottom of the bed and I slept with her, I knew she was very close. She started her contractions soon after and I placed her gently in her nest. Knowing I was there, comforted her, I stroked her head and as the night drew on, I dozed intermittently. But not for long... I could hear Hermione gently cry, I stroked her head as the first little baby came to us. Hermione knew exactly what her job was and washed her first baby clean, until a little squeal was heard, we both instantly fell in love, all over again. And soon after, now past one am, another little baby came into the world...

At approximately 5am, Hermione had successfully delivered all 5 babies, she had done it. What a clever girl she was, and for the first time, I felt like a mummy too.....I was so proud of my girl.

Hermione was wonderful to her babies, she ate, fed, slept in succession, until the 5 kittens were lovely and round...I was totally in love with all of them but I knew I had to find forever loving homes for them all, well, apart from one, I called her Lunar. The most exotic Grey you had ever seen.

Hermione loved and played with her kittens until it was time to let them leave their nest and find love elsewhere...she had me, she had Lunar.

This all happened last July, all too quick for a young girl but I was hoping to breed from Hermione, albeit it be with another Ragdoll! She had all the tests and was in great health.

But Hermione longed to be with her Toms' big family down the road...Feral cats, too many, I tried to intervene and get help from the RSPCA, too many were being fed, but not spayed or neutered. This was all too exciting for Hermione....she had joined their 'gang'...

It was hard for me, I had lived a life with an indoor cat...Effie-May was her name, she was happy. She never strayed further from her enclosed garden, but for Hermione, she would sit and cry for her Tom... My new husband not realising the perils of a Ragdoll would allow her freedom... But as we all know, she got too used to it.

Hermione, fell pregnant just before she was ready to be spayed after her first litter. One too many playtimes with Mr.Tom and his brooding family...I felt sad for her.

She had the litter, all 6 beautiful babies, again with me by her side. But it was too soon. All but one baby, a little thing, the runt as they call them, struggled on....It was soon apparent that Hermione couldn't cope with feeding them all this time, so I helped her feed them all, dry milk powder donned the worktops, equal measures of sterile warm water to solution, I really was becoming quite the mother hen, this really helped Hermione. She, and her babies were taken to my local vets for a thorough check over. Bless them, they could see I was exhausted from the feeds, as was Hermiome, so for the next day, the team at the vets, took over feeding duties for both mum and I.

We were so relieved, Hermione slept and I cleaned the house, top to bottom.

A few days passed and Hermione wanted her freedom. She would sleep, play, dart about the grass paddock and generally relax away from her babies, although for one baby, I could see, she was struggling...

This little baby was quite still, smaller and cradled herself to sleep, I watched her.....not before long, I knew I had to be the one to keep her alive. She slept on my chest, took swabs of sweet nectar and water from her teat, and slept. She and I began to keep to a rhythm of pattern, little feeds, sleeps, warmth. Sticky from nectar, I gently bathed her, wrapped her warm, and tried her on formula, throughout the next few days and throughout the night, she became stronger, a little each day. She was so special to me. In the corner of her eye shone, a bright white fuzz of fur...Sparkles, that had to be her name.

Hermione grew distant from me, her babies and would want her freedom, this scared me. Eventually all her babies had forever homes.

Lunar and Sparkles were inseparable.. They were adorable together, they literally did everything together, ate, played, slept in the same cosy bed. Mum watched on and could see her babies growing up but now I could see that perhaps she didn't know if they were her own flesh and blood.. Hermione kept her distance from her girls, wouldn't allow them to cuddle up to her or dart through her legs...Hermione had changed but she still needed me. They grew fatter, Sparkles all the more strong. Eventually Hermione knew they were part of our family and accepted them, from a distance. We were happy for 8 months, Hermione became warmer, needy and loving once again.

This year I had my 50th birthday in August, 7th actually.....it was a lovely day...

On the 11th August, my family decided to take ourselves to the coast.... a lovely warm day. We returned in the evening around 8pm and Hermione came to greet us. We went to bed, although I was restless, I woke throughout the night. At 7am, I looked at my phone, a missed call. A text, but I didn't know who from, as I sat on the edge of my bed, blood draining from my body, I read that text. I still have that text. Hermione had been killed. I rushed downstairs, in my pyjamas, my slippers and I just ran out of the house....I knew where to run to, no one told me where, but I just knew. And there she was. My girl, my beautiful, Hermione....The shock sent me into a wail when I lifted a tissue that covered her face, her beautiful, shattered little face, her blood soaked body, her limp, heavy body that I cradled close to my breaking heart....I just screamed and cried and wailed, I was broken with her. I still am, all the memories rushing back to haunt me....

My husband dug, I held her, I cried... I buried her.

The next day, I had to see her. I dug, I cried, I held her once more...I wiped the earth from her, the blood from her mouth and ears...I wrapped her in a white pillow case from my bed. Kissed her goodbye. My Hermione.

Cats love to roam, chase the butterflies, hide amongst the grass and play....but, as we know and for some breeds, the roads are no difference to our little felines, but they come with such danger. Lunar and Sparkles, can play for 2 hours a day, but those 2 hours, I'm overcome with dread...But 2 hours and I call them in, they play in my paddock and never near the road, but now, with their cattery, they are safe, they sleep inside and never venture outside in the rain, the snow, the wind or the darkness of the night.

Although the darkness of the night for me, is filled with dread, fear, sadness. Such sadness.

Rest in peace my darling Hermione, not Faith, nor Hope but just with knowing I will never, ever forget you.


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